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Articles in DO-IT-YOURSELF BOOK FAIL

Prancercise: The Art of Physical and Spiritual Excellence
February 10, 2014 – 7:59 pm | No Comment
Prancercise: The Art of Physical and Spiritual Excellence

Prancercise: The Art of Physical and Spiritual Excellence is a physical exercise book that truly challenges the mind. The task that it presents the reader is figuring out whether this ostensibly outlandish tome is anything other than an exercise in mischief and absurdity.

How to Good-bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?
July 18, 2009 – 2:17 am | 2 Comments
How to Good-bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?

Most people perform pelvic floor exercises to avert prolapse, or to experience mindblowingly powerful orgasms. In case you are in no imminent danger of either, you now have a perfectly valid reason to join the Kegel Revolution. I recommend performing pelvic floor muscle exercise while browsing this website. Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. Submited [...]

The Testicle CookBook: Cooking with Balls
July 17, 2009 – 2:40 am | 4 Comments
The Testicle CookBook: Cooking with Balls

The perfect gift for the gourmet chef who has everything, or your friendly neighborhood feminist vegetarian. Source: Geekologie

The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Improving Your IQ
July 2, 2009 – 3:56 am | No Comment
The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Improving Your IQ

The irony train is leaving the station. Next stop, Dummerville. Companion book: How to Raise Your I.Q. by Eating Gifted Children

How to Date a White Woman: A Practical Guide for Asian Men
June 30, 2009 – 9:43 pm | No Comment
How to Date a White Woman: A Practical Guide for Asian Men

According to Amazon.com, 14% of customers who view this book, buy the video game Civilization IV instead. I guess playing video games and not dating white women go hand in hand.

Do-It-Yourself Coffins: For Pets and People
June 23, 2009 – 12:38 am | One Comment
Do-It-Yourself Coffins: For Pets and People

Personally, I think that this is exactly the kind of inside-the-box thinking we need to get ourselves through these Tough Economic Times™. Purchase it together with Knitting With Dog Hair: Better A Sweater From A Dog You Know and Love Than From A Sheep You’ll Never Meet, as well as a filler item and receive [...]

Knitting With Dog Hair: Better A Sweater From A Dog You Know and Love Than From A Sheep You’ll Never Meet
June 22, 2009 – 4:15 am | 6 Comments
Knitting With Dog Hair: Better A Sweater From A Dog You Know and Love Than From A Sheep You’ll Never Meet

Who knows, this recession might come to an end at some point, sparing some of us the necessity of wearing a sweater made out of our pets. Alternate title: Shed Your Dignity As Your Pet Sheds His Hair. Companion book: Do-It-Yourself Coffins: For Pets and People

Well Blow Me Down: A Guys Guide to Talking Like a Pirate
June 21, 2009 – 10:01 pm | 4 Comments
Well Blow Me Down: A Guys Guide to Talking Like a Pirate

You take this book, pair it with English as a Second F*cking Language: How to Swear Effectively, and you may have the two most useless linguistics books ever written.

Dick: A User’s Guide
May 3, 2009 – 5:54 am | No Comment
Dick: A User’s Guide

What’s with women these days? First, they want to pee standing up now. Now they are authoring manuals for male genitalia? I wonder if these women find diamonds in the ruff with this user guide. Via: OneMinuteBookReviews

1337 h4x0r h4ndb00k
May 3, 2009 – 4:13 am | No Comment
1337 h4x0r h4ndb00k

In case you’re wondering what this book is about, here’s an exerpt: This is your ticket into the elusive underworld of the Internet, home to millions of elite computer hackers. 1337 h4x0r h4ndb00k will show you how to walk-the-walk and talk-the-talk of this exclusive community. Soon, you too will be able to go into a [...]

The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Clear Thinking
May 2, 2009 – 4:30 pm | One Comment
The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Clear Thinking

Maybe if you are a complete idiot… ehh, nevermind.

How to Pee Standing Up : Tips for Hip Chicks
May 2, 2009 – 2:24 am | 3 Comments
How to Pee Standing Up : Tips for Hip Chicks

What does it say about our civilization when men are trying to pee sitting down, while women are trying to pee standing up with the help of various gadgets?